That's how I'm feeling right now.
Truthfully, I don't feel much like writing, but so many people are asking for updates that I figure this is just easiest.
Brenna has been miserable and in pain since Friday morning. Fortunately she's been sleeping decently, but during awake hours, she's been crying or fussing constantly with little relief. We've been alternating Tylenol and Ibuprofen practically around the clock, which affords us a few sporadic hours of comfort each day.
The vomiting is not worse, but is still continuing, despite extremely slow feedings. She keeps the majority of feedings down, but still throws up maybe a third of them. Last night, she threw up so violently that it irritated the wound from her g-tube surgery and she bled a little.
She will only eat about 20-30 from the bottle, and we are tube-feeding the rest. She will pull away and cry out after that small amount.
Some spots on her face, head and chest have opened up bleeding in the past couple of days. We will be seeing her dermatologist today to hopefully get reassurance that there isn't another infection present.
Brenna is very anxious after her week in the hospital. She cries at any movements, changes in positioning, touching...much like when she came home from the NICU. It pains me to see her like that, and I pray that she won't have to experience any health problems for a long time and those negative memories will fade for her.
I've been talking with several of her doctors today about all of these issues, but otherwise I just don't know what else to do besides love on her and make her as comfortable as I can. I hate not knowing what is wrong and feeling so helpless while my baby is obviously in pain and discomfort.